Addiction - Lack of control - Detachment

I was going to write the details of what is going on with me but it was too depressing.  I am dealing with a person who is an addict and just got out of jail.  Luckily for him the doctors there continued to supply him with his usual pain killers. I am not sure why no one in the medical world understands that this is problem. Phantom pain created by the mind to feed the addiction.

This is my cousin and we do not have daily relationship but I am in charge of his financial welfare through a trust set up by his grandmother. Ten years now and with my program skills I have handled the many crisis pretty well but as we know this is a progressive disease.

I am not interested in repeating the sorted details here but lets just say I was dreading him being released after six months.  The day of the release he sounded the most normal he has ever sounded but within hours he was spiraling out of control. I know I can do nothing about this he claims he is going to NA but who knows.

He is emotionally is about 12 and has anger problems which he gets from his father.  My aunt raised him and she was very strict and didn't let him pour his own milk until he was ten. She treated everyone in her house like this even keeping her husband's shirts behind locked doors. Her daughter with developmental problems didn't have a chance and turned her child over to my aunt and chose to live on the streets. Occasionally coming home for a few months and then one night putting her clothes in a trash bag and climbing out the window at age 35.

They had money and money rules when it comes to these kinds of things. I am surprised that he has managed to keep things together this long.  He is 38 and truthfully I am not sure if mentally he is capable of getting better even without the drugs. His wife filed divorce papers during the six months he was in jail and taking their two kids. She is equally as messed up as he is and they have lost their kids to the state twice.

I said I wasn't going to get into the details but there they are but believe me there are more.  I keep my distance and as a trustee make my decisions about helping them as detached as possible. With the kids in the house we have paid for rent and electricity directly so the money isn't spent on drugs.

I am glad I am back to meetings and feel strong enough to deal with this almost daily.  Today my phone is on "do not disturb" and I am celebrating peace.  I will do my best and with the help of my own higher power all will be well.