I watched Oprah last night and they were talking about weight gain and addiction to food. Oprah talked about how when recently she said no to someone she immediately wanted to eat and how now she realized that this went back to her childhood and the repercussion she faced when she didn’t please someone. Her Grandmother would whip her and then threaten her if she cried about it denying her emotions so she needed an outlet.
No matter what we do there will always be that small child inside that seeks the approval of someone and the need to feel approval and unconditinal love. Learning to love ourselves is the hardest part of recovery. Our obsessions whether food or the alcoholic are a symptom of denying our feelings. Sometimes it is saying yes when you want to say no or being in a relationship that no longer supports us. We say yes when our subconscious is saying this isn’t what I want any more and then feeling guilty for not appreciating what we have. Not wanting to face those feelings of being trapped.
Seeing things as they are sometimes is more than we can take and so we run towards something else. Facing the truth about what we are feeling doesn’t mean we have to walk away from something or somebody just that we have to ask ourselves what do we want truly want. Everyone deserves to be happy and loving ourselves enough to be honest about our latest obsession can start to release the pain of the past and find small ways to redirect our lives towards what we do want.
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