This blog is for those searching to find hope and support from living with the effects of alcoholism.
Monday, November 7, 2011
Chocolate and other therapy
So I have done no work today so far. I had such a great day off yesterday and was so excited I couldn't sleep last night. I got up and roamed around the house looking at all that I have accomplished in the past couple of days. I even commented on a few blogs at 2 AM.
I am foggy today and can't seem to get motivated. When I am in that mode I end up writing. I produced a very dull post and decided to ditch it and try again.
After I spewed forth my weaknesses with Saturday post I got over myself and decided to do something different. I have gotten into the habit of going home every night and curling up in my bed and watching TV. This past week I added to the routine eating Hershey nuggets. Purchased on the slim chance of having trick or treaters. This was unlikely since I didn't turn the light on. This was not a good addition to the routine.
Lets just say a bag of chocolate and millions of hours of TV can bring you to a place where you are having an out of body experience. Luckily I am not clinically depressed so the low really was good for me and I thought to myself, you have to stop doing this. Really I mean it this time.
Saturday after work I ate the last piece of candy and turned the TV off and went to my studio. A few hours later I had three new paintings which I will post if I can figure out how to send them from my IPhone. It is hard to get out of a rut it feels so good so comforting and familiar. But a rut can slowly eat away at you and put on weight on you at the same time.
Sunday I got up and cleaned yet another disaster area in my house and then worked on a puzzle for an hour or two. Very funny puzzle with a million different cartoon characters.
Everything feels right today. I have a job, which I apparently do not want to do today. I have a house that is perfect for me which even has a studio. I am exactly where I need to be today even if I could have used a few more hours of sleep.
Even if I have to stumble back into the past occasionally I don't stay too long. The promises say, we will not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it. I guess it is the only way to see just how far we have come.
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Yesterday's daily meditation from The Language of Letting Go suggested we find something fun to do. Perhaps you were doing what is fun for you. I enjoy watching tv, eating chocolate, and playing Bejeweled on my computer. All accomplish nothing, but I like it. :)
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