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| My Mum |
When I have a reoccurring theme in my life such as I have now where I am being rejected by people who I thought were my friends I have a hard time distinguishing between my part ant there part. Did I do something to deserve this or am I attracting this the way they talk about in the Law of Attraction.
When I take responsibility for everything I get worn out and end up stuck. I need to accept that I don't always cause the problem so I can't fix it. When I have relationship problems it makes me think something is wrong with me instead of accepting that sometimes things happen and relationships end.
People leave sometimes voluntarily and sometimes not as when my mother died. It feels like every time I think someone has my back they disappear. I think maybe God wants to show me that I can be strong on my own. I don't have to have a back up plan he is my back up plan.
Things are really changing in my life right now. It makes me want to whine like I child. I want things to be stable for awhile this of course is an illusion of the human kind. Nothing last forever good or bad so if you hang on long enough then you can see your life transform.
Letting go of the idea that I am in control relieves me from my suffering. When I can do this everything comes together usually in a way that I never imagined.
We can get through, even when we feel stuck, unable, or maybe even unworthy. Our Higher Power is there for us in all our times, good and not so good.
ReplyDeleteLoss is inevitable in life, but it doesn't mean that I'm at fault somehow. Loving self-acceptance makes me more compassionate and accepting of the frailties of others. You are just fine exactly as you are today - embrace the wonderful person that is you!
God bless.
"Letting go of the idea that I am in control" does bring relief huh. People come and go and we can only fix what we see and are aware of in ourselves. So I pray for open eyes and an open heart to see my part. Not always easy....but at least we are willing! That is huge!
ReplyDeleteSo very true. I inventory my actions and look at my motives. That helps me to not place all the blame on someone else.
ReplyDeletegosh, we sound so similar. you very much described me here. i'm {at 41} finally learning to accept that sometimes, it's about the other person, and not about me. i had two very close people walk away from me when i was pregnant, and i could not for the life of me figure out what i did that would warrant that. still can't. but i'm now accepting that it was their issues that caused the break, because i didn't want them to leave. i have finally stopped asking myself what i did wrong, especially because i could never come up with an answer, and neither did they ever give me one. that makes me know it was a problem on their end that they were not willing to do the hard work to get through... which they have every right to do. it still hurts. but it's freeing to know i don't have to take blame for them walking away.
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