Healing - Save Yourself

I watched this movie called "Take Care" about a couple who after he recovers from cancer he dumps her. In the movie she guilt's him into taking care of her after she has a serious car accident.  I liked the movie because it is about healing and about emotions what is really going on behind what people do.

On the surface it seems people do terrible hurtful things but it is never meant to be personal. In fact it takes courage sometimes to do the unpopular thing "save yourself".  I have never been that brave to look deep inside and decide my own happiness is more important than the promises I have made to others.

It isn't because I am such a good person it is because I feel more comfortable being the victim.  It is a role I have played in most situations where it was me versus them. Maybe because I know first hand what it feels like to be left and couldn't imagine putting someone through that. On the other hand I always think "this has got to get better" which as we all know sometimes that isn't true.

I am not a person of action emotionally.  I am conditioned to be more of a person of contemplation and by the time I emerge with a moment of clarity the world has passed me by.  The more impatient folks have gone on their lives.

I have accepted that this is my way.  Sometimes this way has left me isolated and sometime lonely but this where my life has led me up to now and I have few regrets.

When I see people behaving badly I hurt for them because I can only imagine what has gone on in their lives to bring them to this point.  What do they believe about themselves that could make them hurt other people or sometimes even themselves.

We are the sum of all the thoughts we have ever had about ourselves. Maybe some of them are true maybe we think some were passed down to us but which ones. We can't blindly trust what our mind tells us because sometimes our thoughts can hurt us and make us hurt other people.

In the movie the ex boyfriend admits he left her because she represented the cancer and he wanted to forget that it happened. Life gave him the opportunity to heal himself and heal the one left behind.