This day has meant a lot of things to me over the years. The early years while living with the effects of alcoholism I tried to use the holidays to make up for the pain I felt in the rest of my life. I wanted everything to be perfect one time I talked everyone into dressing up like pilgrims. My controlling of others had no limit. Amazingly they did it and it was pretty funny.
Later on I did recreate the Thanksgiving of the Martha Stewart kind and I did this out of love and genially enjoyed the process. That time in my life is over and most of the people that were there for that are no longer in my life. Today I can accept that and my journey has moved forward. It has taken me two years to get to this point and to realize that life goes one. Like it or not.
Today I am having an unconventional Thanksgiving with the people I love and that love me. That is all you can really ask for in life and I am grateful to be able to see that now. The program has given me a life I never even knew existed. I can be who I am and know that I am loved and accepted. This is what I consider a spiritual awakening.
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