I was driving down the road yesterday when three very large ducks decided to cross the road. They weren't in too big of a hurry and really never even took note of me. They were pretty large and with there long necks looked very graceful. I was glad I wasn't lost in some faraway thought it might not have been such a beautiful scene.
My friend and I were on our way back from a sound healing session. Where each person finds there own tone and they express it in unity with the group. I was nice and a very social afternoon. My philosophy is as always whatever works for you and take what you like and leave the rest.
These days I feel that I am really changing inside. Even some of my biggest angst are fading into the back ground. My sight is getting clearer and clearer and I am willing to let go of some of my most childish thoughts.
During the sound toning exercise she asked us to think of something that embodied complete love. The one thing that made us feel love. My mother popped into my mind. I could see her on her knees praying by the bed. She been gone 39 years and she is still my greatest love.
On the way home my friend said she saw her daughters. We talked about a mother's love and how no other love compares to that.
I don't believe that if my mother had lived that I would be the person that I am today. Her death took me down and built me up at the same time. I had to overcome a lot of things. Even now when I am lonely and tired I wish she was here to comfort me and give advice. Not that I would take it but it would be nice.
Last night around nine I started feeling restless and bored. I decided I needed to get out of the house. I threw on my running cloths and headphones and ran out the door. I ran around my neighborhood until I couldn't run anymore.
Sometimes you just got to get out and run. It felt like freedom to me and I am grateful I my body goes along with this desire. I feel happy right now and feel my life is about to open up in a good way. God's timing is never off even if from my perspective nothing is happening.
Like those ducks I am not too interested in the reality of my situation I just moving ahead at my own pace and trusting the universe will oblige me.