Sunday, August 23, 2015

People just don't change - Or do they?

We had a meeting this week with the owner of the company he was telling us the plans to reorganize given the resignation of one of the companies key players.  He made a statement that made me want to raise my hand and object.  He said "people just don't change ".

I wanted to say "people don't change unless they want to" but I didn't think a sales meeting was really the place to bring that up. Sometimes people even change even when they don't want to. Life's circumstance can force you to rise up and be more courageous then you ever imagined you could be.

Sometimes you feel like you just got to flee knowing that you are choosing the hard way. You aren't willing to listen to reasons and something inside just has to make a change no matter what the consequences. My friend that left was stuck and jumping overboard seemed like the only answer to being stuck. I know it will work out no matter what.

In my own life I have been mostly forced to change.  I have a tendency to stay too long in my relationships whether they are personal or professional. My analytical mind calculates the time invested with the my fear that there isn't anything better out there. This idea together with the hope that the other person or company will somehow magically change keeps me stuck.

When I chose to leave my business and take a new job with this company it was the first time I moved on first. Granted I had a few years of stagnation before taking the leap. If you read my blog you know it wasn't a easy transition for me. I felt like I had been sent to boot camp except without any body telling me what I should be doing.

I am proud of myself for making the leap and surviving.  I really have learned a lot and have the resources I need to do as much business as I want to do without being managed too closely.

So I am here to say anybody can change. If you wake up unhappy most days it is probably time to make some kind of change. Even if it is something small it will start the ball rolling.

Don't expect a lot support from other people when you start to make changes because you are disturbing their idea of you. We put each other in little boxes in our mind it makes us feel good to think we really know someone. If they change we think we were wrong and question out judgement about them and everything else.

Since I have experienced many changes I learned to not hold on too tightly to anything or anyone. I try to enjoy what is happening now and accept that everything is always changing even if I can't see it on the surface.  It is the way life is and holding on only tires us out.

Making changes to make us happier is always a good choice eventually.  Sometimes is small changes are enough to make our days lighter and we can be more loving to the people that love us.

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