Isolation - Reflection - Projects

We are still open at work.  I am off today because this is my regular day off.  We stayed open on Saturday and no one came in so we closed early.  We are having a meeting with the owner tomorrow to discuss the plan the residential sales people.

In our group some people have a few active jobs but I don't have much going on.  I feel peaceful right now and glad that I have a number of projects to do around my house.  Luckily I have a habit of getting excited about something and then going out and buying the supplies I need to make it happen. I usually have to go back to work before I can get started so I have a lot of projects waiting for me. This time will give me the opportunity to get some things done.  Who knew procrastination would actually be a good thing.

Yesterday I was able to pressure wash my driveway.  I had planned to do this two weeks ago but I couldn't get the pressure washer started. After a half dozen YouTube videos and some carburetor cleaner I did finally get it started.  I know it sat too long and this is the kiss of death for small engines I will do better next time. The driveway is nice and clean it was a long overdue project.

Being outside all day was nice even though a little extra quiet.  It reminded me of the days before a hurricane is expected everybody is shutdown listening to the latest news. Our mind is not our friend at these times. It is working to either figure our why this is happening or searching for a solution especially when we have lost our day to day routine.  The routine that distracts us from the fear that lies beneath.

I plan on putting together a daily routine for myself so I don't end up flopped on my bed watching virus numbers on TV or bad movies.  This is a rare moment when the world isn't focused on wanting things and can really evaluate what is really important to them.  This gift of time is rare when no one is expecting anything from us we can just make plans or do nothing.

I know for any small business that relies on physical walk in customers will be devastated. Especially the restaurants where people rely on tips to survive. I started out my life in this industry so I know most places don't value the people working for tips. Without business they don't get paid.

I do believe that this will pass quicker than people imagine once the numbers peak.  Once the quarantine is over we will come to terms with our new normal. We are adaptive and want to get our lives back to a routine as quickly as possible. This isn't 2008 even if the stock market looks like it. I am not saying there won't be significant fall out for some industries but it is not the same.

I hope you are able to take this time and take care of yourselves and your life.  Be grateful to be with people you love and reflect on what is right about your life and maybe what isn't working. I noticed on some of my regular weekly YouTube videos everyone looks so rested. In this country we definitely need to slow down. We move so fast and everyone feels so guilty when they want to rest. This is the perfect opportunity to just rest.

I do have to mention that at least it is spring instead of winter so we can be inspired by nature's new beginnings. Keep safe and know that spending time at home alone will not kill you and may actually save your life quite literally.
 

Expectations - How low can they go?

I was riding to lunch with my partner the other day and we were talking about expectations. I told here she would be happier if she lowered her expectations. She thought that was the most ridiculous thing she had heard. Why should she lower her standards.

I didn't really get into all the reasons why but I remembered how miserable I was before the program taught me about the perils of expectations. I was so self-righteous and indignant about how people acted and treated me.

It was all about me and every time something didn't go my way I took it as a personal attack. I knew what was best and if they would listen they would be better off. I had to learn the hard way that nothing is really about me. What a blow to my ego.

It has taken me many years to see just how self-absorbed I am, still working on that. I hid it well behind my good deeds and martyrdom. It was part of my facade to be the victim in my life. The regular people help to keep this delusion going by agreeing with how badly you are being treated.

This doesn't work with people in the program. No one lets you be the victim anymore. Besides it is really time consuming and draining to talk about your woes all the time. I had a lot woes and luckily my sponsor was a patient woman and would regularly tell me to get off the pity potty.

I can admit it is still all about me. The difference is that now I know that it is like that for everyone. We are the center of our own universe and like it or not no one is really thinking that much about anyone but themselves. They got their own universe to manage and I will never be the center of theirs.

How did I get off the subject of expectations, I am not sure I really did. Life is nothing but one big expectation and this is what makes us unhappy not getting that expectation met.

Our expectation assumes that we have the best plan and other people just need to get on board. Because don't they want happy like I am. How do we know we have the best plan, we don't.