Saturday, August 3, 2013

Flying by the seat of my pants - Something new
My new work life has started  with my old life not even close to being wrapped up. I feel I am straddling two boats that are quickly drifting apart. It feels weird to be doing something different going someplace different and having new co-workers.

I took a leap and went to work for another company. It is weird actually having people other than customers to work with each day.  I have been isolated a lot over the past few years especially this year.

I have a new office and a new computer to go along with the new co-workers.  Yesterday I panicked a little with all the information coming at me. My mind has been coasting for awhile now and is now realizing that the vacation is over. I don't mind I am ready.

I have done just about all the soul searching and spiritual work someone can do with all the alone time. It has been one big 4th step digging for anything buried that might be holding me back. My bags are pretty light and for that I am grateful.

I need to prove to myself that I have still got it.  Luckily out of the six people I am working with I am actually the youngest so at least I can't use the old card as an excuse. I was scared yesterday and wanted to run away. I always think somehow other people are quicker than me. It may be true sometimes but I can hold my own. I eventually work things out for myself and usually develop a system that make things easier for me.

There is drama there with all those personalities. One person has a kind of negative view and tells me just how hard it is to get things done and how unfair things are there. I have found that too much time with them and I feel discouraged like I am climbing a big mountain.

Luckily we are pretty independent so besides my training we won't be hanging out much.  I forgot about office politics I am the kind of person that ignores that kind of stuff unless it affects me personally. I was never good at playing the game.

I am working my first showroom duty today with two other people. I know nothing about the product so I will be flying by the seat of my pants. Wish me luck.


  1. I remember well the feeling of wanting to run away when my mind would inform me that I wasn't enough: well-informed enough, skilled enough, fast enough, educated enough...the list is endless.

    You are enough just as you are - I'm sure you'll do very well. God bless.