This week my friend whose mother passed away called to let me know her father died last weekend. This was basically a month to the day her mother died. She of course was in shock.
He was not exactly father of the year leaving her mother for his secretary when we were kids. He and his new wife of 40 something years were mainly focused on making money. They had a big house in Hilton Head and as my friend learned this week ignored both sides of the family equally. My friend always assumed he was spending time with the other grand kids and not with her kids.
During her mother's funeral he made the comment that he wasn't mentioned during the service. Her brother told him that when his time came they would talk about him. No one could have predicted it would be so soon.
How strange life is and how you never what you will be dealing with next. My friends her mother never really got over be left by her dad. She had a full life but made a decision to never marry again. My friend said these last years she started talking more about him and how her life could have been different if her dad hadn't left.
My friend loved her dad despite his indifference to her and her own family. She spoke to him a couple of times his last few days. She was able to tell him she loved him. Because he lived out of town the last time she saw him was at her mother's funeral.
Even though his life seemed enviable from her mothers perspective they had their problems. They were isolated and his wife has had severe dementia for many years. Since they alienated their family they were alone and he had to drive himself to the emergency room. He died of double pneumonia aggravated by double prescribed cholesterol drugs.
You never know just how things will go or who will be there for you in the end. My like feels pretty empty these days but I am making changes. I feel good and ready to do something different with my personal life. I want my life to be fuller and in the end I want to feel content with the choices I have made.