Monday, August 23, 2010

Maturity

-Blueprint for Progress

Page 34

Maturity is the growing awareness that you are neither all powerful nor helpless. It could be said to be the knowledge of what is, what might be, and what cannot be. It is not a destination; it is a road. It is the moment when you wake up after some grief or staggering blow and think, "I'm going to live, after all."

Page 31

Maturity is simply being grown up. It is the quality in people which helps them to balance their intellect with their emotions so that their is appropriate. The ability to do the right thing at the right time requires a clear eyed view of a situation and an understanding of human limitations.

I have had these passages hanging on my wall at work for a couple of years and felt that they are appropriate for me right now. I am getting past the grief and focusing on my responsibilities. Grief is like alcoholism cunning, baffling and powerful. It feels like bobbing in water, sometimes I have the energy to stay above the water and then sometimes I am exhausted and let it take me under.

The worst has passed for me it has been a long haul but I lost a lot and I know that now. Someone told me once that I was too trusting and this is true. It is too hard for me to worry about what someone else is doing so when it all blows up in my face it take me a long time to grieve and that is OK. I am the person God made me and I can accept myself.

Today I am moving on and taking care of my grown up responsibilities. I worked through the weekend and came in today on my day off to meet with a client. They were surprised by my ideas and said they didn't think I could come up with any new solutions. I love what I do and that in itself is a true gift.

So here is to being mature for today and getting things done. Grief is powerful and paralyzing and makes me feel I a will never be the same. When it lifts nothing really seems like a big deal and I wonder why I procrastinated for so long. This is how I know that it is grief.

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