Tuesday, December 20, 2011
Man selling his shoes - A way out - Moses
The showroom is in a rather depressed area of town. 40 years ago it was the up and coming area but now it is more industrial and backs up to a large neighborhood.
We have a lot of foot traffic and often have people come by sometimes for hand outs and sometimes for odd jobs. I have never been afraid. Once a guy came in with a staff like Moses and our receptionist quit the next day.
Today a guy came in selling his shoes. He had a big Target bag and said they were pretty nice. He said no one will let him work and that he needed the money. I said I understood but couldn't help him.
He looked a little glazed over and I did feel sad for him but I didn't give him money. I have on occasion given out a few bucks. I am never sure what to do and whether if I give him money will he come back again. This has also happened.
I am alone here today and was expecting a customer when I went to the front. I made a quick decision and decided not to help.
It is easy to dismiss those in need and think drugs and alcohol but as we all know the need starts before the abuse. Some pain so great that escape seems the only answer.
I didn't have an easy childhood but it was easier than a lot of people had. It has taken me quite sometime to get over the past so I can imagine if you had it real bad the odds of getting over it are against you.
I found my own miracle in the program and I have seen miracles happen to others. It saved my life taught me how to unravel my distorted thinking. It made me realize that everything I thought was true was just my own perspective. If I was open to changing my perspective the possibilities were endless.
I had inadvertently labeled myself as broken and unfix able. Everything bad happened to me. This trapped me in my own story of sadness and abuse. I learned I could start over every day and prove that story wrong. I could change my words and eventually change my mind.
I still have problems but I don't accept them as just my lot in life. Everything is temporary and this too shall pass. I don't have to look for someone to blame or even turn that blame on myself. I can take responsibility when it is mine and let the rest go.
I am freer than I have ever been and wish for everyone to find what I have found. A power greater than myself.
Picture by Me