Saturday, April 21, 2012

Prograstination and manipulation

It looks like we have to use the new blog format.  It is just like me to wait until I am forced to accept something new over something old.  I have accepted that that is the way I operate.

Sometimes my procrastination to try new things works for me. Especially when it comes to electronics and all things computer related. If you jump too quickly the creators haven't worked out all the bugs yet and you in up enmeshed is problems no one is sure how to solve.

I usually just hang back for the 2nd or 3rd generations before making the leap. In the case of my phone it died and over night I leaped into the iPhone.  It was the 3G and free because 4G was  the new thing. I will probably never be cutting edge in the electronic world.

In the spiritual realm I am more cutting edge. The lessons I have learned from the program have shot me so far in the future it is mind boggling. I have come so far from the way I use to think about everything I can't even imagine how I lived the way I did before.

Driving in the car on a business trip with my partner this weekend made me realise how different I am than I use to be. I was telling her how the program made me see just how crazy my thinking was and how I use to think I had to manipulate people into doing what I wanted. Instead of just asking for what I wanted. She does this sometimes.

I told her I learned this as a child with my stepmother. I learned how to play the game to use the back door to get what I wanted. I don't need that now. I had to un-learn that over the years. I am not that kid anymore never getting anything I wanted. Ask and you shall receive. It isn't so easy to ask for what you want you first have to feel you deserve it.  That is another post entirely.

I wanted her to know if she wanted something to just ask me. She didn't need to manage me that I would prefer an honest and open relationship. I am a reasonable person and we could talk anything out.

I was always good at playing God manipulating people. Sometimes for my own benefit but other times I thought it was what was best for them. I couldn't just live and let live I thought I knew better. I always thought I was humble and thoughtful but it takes a big ego to think you know what is best for someone else.

What you do is  really none of my business unless you ask me. I can offer my views but what you do with them isn't my responsibility either.

It is pretty freeing to step out of the God role and let life just happen.

This of course is just my opinion. Take what you like and leave the rest.


1 comment:

  1. As a graphic artist I used to begin all of my assignments right before they were due. It seemed my creative side was at it's peak during these times and I was told it worked for me. I think it did. Putting things off is not always a bad thing.