Saturday, November 10, 2012

Dealing with unacceptable behavior

I have had a stressful week dealing with a couple of very vocal customers. I usually don't shy away from confrontation especially in business but when someone is on a rant it leaves me speechless.

It reminds me of a time when my husband use to do that and I know now that is a controlling tactic. People use it to rollover anyone that might be in their path. It worked then and it works now on me if there is anything I think I did wrong or could have done better which is the same thing.

I have learned it doesn't do me any good to try to explain myself because they aren't interested in an explanation or really anything you have to say. The whole thing is about shutting you down and feeling superior.

Deep down I want to do everything right and think everyone should play fair but they don't. In the case of my customers one didn't listen to what I said or read the emails I sent and they were distracted checking their text and reading emails during my visit.

I was going to call them on Friday to tell them there has been another delay but I didn't want to take their wrath. Then I have been mad at myself for not standing up to them and just picking up the phone. I really chickened out today and sent an email. It was my partners suggestion. She will be here on Monday when I am not and when the call comes in and she is more than happy to handle the situation.

Before the program when my husband blamed me for everything that was wrong in the universe I accepted it as the truth. He was my universe so he must be right.

I know that isn't true now not everything is my fault and I knew when I took on the project it wasn't going to be easy. They had had problems with other people doing projects for them. This is always a red flag in this business. But I was already in and hoped it would be different with me if I was really clear. Ha. I never learn. I think some how I can handle it better than the other guy. That of course is my ego.

I am learning though and I have a great business partner that encourages me not to take on these clients. I do it because I want carry my weight but in the end it doesn't work out and is too stressful for me. I would say one in 30 customers are perpetually unhappy. It is a shame that they can make you want to change careers.

I use to be one of those people people who always thought someone was out to get me. I was the victim and when you are the victim everything does go wrong from bad service in a restaurant to lost luggage. Since I have learned that I am not a victim I now assume that everything will go my way and it usually does.

Today I am going to focus on my happy customers and realize that it doesn't always have to be about me.

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