This morning I woke up with a sense of dread. Nothing I could really put my finger on exactly but there it was. I put on some music and said some prayers while getting dressed.
I tried to analyze if it was tied to any particular thoughts. The only thing I could think of was that things are going well for the first time in a long time and can I trust that.
In the last five minutes I just lost a job. The good news is they are going to pay me for the time I put into it and that would be equal to my commission. No money for the company though.
Changing the subject I went a gathering last night that included a yogi. He had a lot of wisdom and it seemed he repeated some of the very ideas I have been harping on here.
He said that all addiction is created by stress. That is not a big surprise is it? He also said that we try to balance the stress by using drugs or food or whatever we can to counter act the stress. He said finding balance in ones life was the only way to fight addiction. The imbalance is in our minds and the only way to get rid of it is to live in the present moment.
I am not a worshipper of men. I feel we are all equal and equally fallible. He has a pretty sweet life with people waiting on him 24/7. It is a good gig if you can get it. Someone did ask him who gave him his title of yogi and he said he gave it to himself. He also said he wrote a 12 step book from his perspective 40 years ago.
With that last sentence I thought, does he have personal experience with the 12 steps? It wasn't as well known 40 years ago as it is now and it doesn't really matter. He had some words of wisdom and as always take what you like and leave the rest.
Hi Grace. This is the same issue I've been working on this week, waking up in fear. There's a lot I can but the short version for me is to stay in the moment, like you said. This is working for me, seeing that everything is alright right now and I can't control the future anyway. Fear is one of the most uncomfortable feelings for me. I'm glad to hear I share the same experiences and solutions with someone else.
ReplyDeleteI too believe that we are equal. I often wished others believe the same. We both wrote about thoughts that may or may not be facts. I tend to over analyze.
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