Monday, July 5, 2010
A family Disease
I went to a party yesterday at a house that I had never been to before and when I went in it reminded me of my life living with alcoholism. I don't know the owner but the house was in great disrepair. There were unfinished projects everywhere and you could feel the sadness there.
I remembered living like that when I was living with alcoholism and even recently to some degree during grief. It is a symptom of something deeper than just bad house keeping for me it was part of being unconscious. The pain of the current situation being too great to face and shutting down.
For me both recently and with the alcoholism of the past I just felt like there was no hope yet I kept trying to think my way out of it. The difference between now and then is I have a program and the support of friends in the program to let me know that I am OK and even if maybe I have gone over the edge.
To those living with sickness what ever it may be there is hope and a power greater than ourselves can restore us to sanity. I took this picture on my way home of the sunset behind the palms it was a slice of gratitude after revisiting the past.