I went to visit a friend last night who hasn't seen me since my timeout started over a month ago. We are not extremely close so she can be a little more objective in her feedback. She is very spiritual and has a lot of insights on the emotional states of others.
She took one look at me and said I was changed. I knew this but the validation was good knowing that it showed. Scott Peck in The Road Less Traveled starts off the book with "Life is difficult". I don't know if it is true for everyone, but for me I apparently have to take the hard road. I can only surmise that it is because in order to survive what life has dished out I learned to dig in deep. I resist the truth about myself and whatever situation that I don't want face. My subconscious continually reveals the truth in subtle ways and sometimes not so subtle ways until I am at such odds with myself I can't function. When the pain becomes so great, I stop resisting and relief and freedom follow.
This has happened to me over and over again. It is how I learn. I can now step back and start making plans for my life. Everything is changed now. What do they say in the program, it works if you work it and even sometimes if you don't.