Friday, September 17, 2010
Seeing the past without emotion
So I went to dinner with my former boss and her husband and it was really was really good to see her. She admitted that she had been hurt when our friendship didn't continue after she was forced to change jobs. I made the choice to explain what was happening from my point of view but with no excuses and no apologies.
It was a time in my life that I was coming into my own and really discovering who I was personally and professionally and I didn't think she was in a place to accept that. She had been my mentor and I her subordinate. I made that judgement and truthfully it was easier on me to avoid dealing with her. In the program I learned JADE I don't have to justify, argue, defend or explain if I don't want to, so I didn't back then.
I did say that it wasn't about her at the time and I said I didn't mean to hurt her. I was wrapped up in my own life and did what I had to do. It goes back to it is not personal just like when she was constantly angry with me at work I learned that it wasn't really about me.
When I got home the reviewing of my life and everything that has taken place since then did actually bring up some tears. Everything that I thought I would last at that time has ended. The career, the relationship even where I live. It is hard accepting that nothing stays the same. It all turns out for the best in the end and I am starting to feel that again in my life. The past three years has kicked my butt and left me with nothing but faith that the future will be brighter.